here. i am starting new. i feel like i have said that so many times. and i have. i really have.... sigh. how is this time different from the rest? i have always been strong, carefree, spontaneous, adventuresome, life-is-too-short-kinda-way girl. but something in the last year has turned my insides into a different place. i ignore my body, i ignore my inner self CRYING out. stop. stop. please just stop. i have put everyone else in front of myself. i have decided to take care of everyone and everything before i get in some time for me. to take care of my body. my mind. my faith. my heart. even as i type this, i am thinking of dinner i need to make tonight and the laundry, vacuuming, sweeping, oh and the dog needs to be walked. yes, and i can pay those bills later too........ where is my health, wellbeing SELF fit into this? my face shows the beat down i have been giving my internal organs. food after food after lack of good exercise, good movement. i am planting a garden out back - h
"Girls love each other like animals. There is something ferocious and unself-conscious about it. We don't guard ourselves like we do with boys. No one trains us to shiel our heads from each other. With girls, it's total vulnerability from the beginning. Our skin bare and soft. We love with claws and teeth and the blood is just proof of how much. It's feral. And it's relentless." -Leah Raeder, Black Iris (via quoted-books )